Forgiving someone who has hurt, violated, and harmed us is no easy feat. However, we can choose to forgive.
You and I know the pain of being hurt. We’ve been heartbroken, despised, and attacked with unpleasant words. We've been knocked down and downtrodden. The list is endless.
I am not trying to open old wounds; rather, I’m trying to help heal them completely. It is time we chose to offload the bitter burden of unforgiveness and enter into a new realm of healing and freedom.
Forgiving someone who has hurt, violated, and mistreated us is not an easy task. However, when you choose to forgive, you’re fulfilling your spiritual mandate. You’re starting to walk on a new and brighter path toward healing and growth.
“The best revenge is to be unlike him who performed the injury.” – Marcus Aurelius.
Perhaps you cannot reckon how you can forgive when you consider the gravity of the pain. I recall somebody who was asked to forgive when she was on her deathbed, but she declined. Another one declared that she wouldn’t forgive even if they met with that person in hell.
Why carry that heavy burden to the grave and hell when you can choose to forgive and live? No matter what happens, you can choose right now to forgive and unlock your door to freedom. It is a tough decision to make, but it’ll help you out of captivity.
Lessons From the Parade of the Unforgiving Servant
The Parable of the Unforgiving Servant (Matthew 18:21–35) illustrates the theme of compassion and eternal consequences.
In this parable, Jesus tells the story of a servant who owed a huge debt to his master. The master, out of compassion, forgave the entire debt when the servant pleaded for mercy. However, the same servant later encountered a fellow servant who owed him a much smaller amount. Instead of showing the same mercy, he demanded payment and even had a fellow servant thrown into prison.
Upon hearing about this, the master was furious. He confronted the unforgiving servant, reminding him that he should have shown the same mercy that was shown to him. As a consequence, the master handed him over to be tortured until he could repay the entire debt.
Peter, an apostle of Jesus, was disturbed by this question of forgiveness.
“Lord, how often shall my brother sin against me and I forgive him? Up to seven times?”– Matthew 18:21.
Jesus used a parable to answer Peter and us (Matthew 18:22-35).
“I say to you, not up to seven times, but up to seventy times seven.” – Matthew 18:22.
From this passage, we can learn that those who have been remarkably forgiven should extend more forgiveness. You and I received much forgiveness at the cross. Jesus paid the price for our sins.
When our spiritual eyes open widely to truly see, understand, and embrace this truth, we’ll extend forgiveness to others.
We’ll banish our bitterness from old wounds. We’ll quit nurturing our way and not allow unforgiveness to block our way into freedom. Nor will we fix boundaries and conditions on forgiveness when we’re hurt. Forgiveness will freely flow out of our hearts without force. Because God forgave us without conditions, without limits, infinitely. God’s forgiveness should be the standard for our forgiveness.
Choose to forgive and live, decline to forgive and chain your own feet so you won’t get out of that prison.
Many people think forgiveness is a weakness. But it is not. It is a doorway to freedom, to recreating damaged relationships, to living in peace with oneself and others. It is key to restoring lost love and joy.
Apostle Paul had a misunderstanding with Barnabas concerning the ministry. I believe before they parted, they had reached a consensus. Paul cautions that when we’re angry, we should not sin by nursing our grudge.
Right now, you and I can make this tough decision. You can call that person you’ve never spoken to since they hurt you. You can organize a meeting with the other person. You can visit the other one
.
You can choose to follow that small voice, the inner voice in your heart that whispers, “Forgive.” Don’t listen to the loud voice in your mind, the incessant voice that boasts, “Revenge.” Only your heart will tell you the truth. Because it is your heart that is hurting. And it is your heart that will continue suffering if you refuse to forgive.
Maybe right now the giant of unforgiveness is weighing you down. Perhaps you’ve tried to forgive but to no avail. Tell Jesus to help you. There’s nothing impossible with Him. He is willing to help you. He is calling on you:
“Come to me all those who labour and are heavily laden, and I will give you rest… for my yoke is easy and my burden is light.” – Matthew 11:28-35.
Remember these powerful lessons from the Parable:
1. Embrace Forgiveness
When someone wrongs you, choose forgiveness over holding onto bitterness. Just as God has forgiven us, let’s show the same grace to others.
2. Let go of Grudges
Take a moment to identify any grudges or unforgiveness in your heart. Release them through prayer and make a conscious decision to set them free.
3. Pursue Reconciliation
If possible, take the initiative to reconcile with those you’ve had conflicts with. It may involve starting conversations, offering apologies, and working to mend broken relationships.
4. Lift Others in Prayer
Don’t forget to pray for those who have hurt you. Ask God to bless them, soften their hearts, and grant them forgiveness as well.
5. Cultivate Empathy
Remember that everyone makes mistakes. Try to put yourself in their shoes, understanding their struggles and weaknesses.
6. Show Kindness
Instead of seeking revenge, respond with acts of kindness. Show love even when it feels difficult.
7. Keep an Eternal Perspective
Remember that our actions have an impact not only in this life but also on our standing before God.
May this article inspire you to choose forgiveness and find freedom.
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